I hope to write about this more extensively soon, but for me the scary thing about the mommy wars is that no matter how well reasoned one’s argument, no matter how graciously stated one’s opinion is, no matter how calm and rational, it all gets casted as contributing to the mommy wars. No matter how meta one takes the argument it is seen as a personal affront and the author is accused of adding fuel to the fire. The clear message to all of us women no matter what we believe about parenting is a resounding, Be Quiet. In the name of “can’t we all just get along?” and “can’t we all just support each other?” is a white-washing of a gritty discourse of privilege, labor, class, gender, consumerism and race. I don’t know what to do about this. Do I drop the discussion completely or do I just ignore this idea that because I am talking about women and babies and problems many of us face that I am necessarily contributing to the mommy wars?